Редактирование: Должности

In /tg/station 13, your job is somewhat akin to your character class.  It defines your starting equipment, your  [[identification_card|access]] on board the station, and what you're supposed to be doing. Remember, these job descriptions are for humor purposes only. Please obey common sense and [[Space Law|Space Law]].

<!-- please remember that this was once in alphabetical order. The reason it was changed is that the list was simply too long for the alphabet to make it easily navigable. It has been changed to match the categorization in the Jobs template, which you can see at the bottom of each job page. -->

== Useful Links ==


* [[Chain of Command]]
* [[Standard Operating Procedure]]
* [[Guides]]
* [[Rules]]
* [[Job selection and assignment]]


== Command ==

{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:lightblue;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_captain.png|64px|link=Captain]]<br>[[Captain]]
|Be responsible for the station. Manage station [[Heads of Staff]]. Secure dat fukken disk. Twist your own head off when the walls start closing in. Have blood feuds with the [[HoP]]. Deal with the Clown with the Laser Cannon. Break your own display case to get your gun for 'MAX PROTECTION'
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_hop.png|64px|link=Head of Personnel]]<br>[[Head of Personnel]]
|<s>Manage</s> Ignore internal problems. Assign jobs, alter IDs, maintain records, give the [[Clown]] all-access, judge the unworthy [[assistant]]s, flood the station with all-access clowns, be the hero the station <s>needs</s> deserves. Protect Ian or die trying!
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|}

== Security ==
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:darkred;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="color:white;background-color:darkred;" |Role
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:darkred;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_hos.png|64px|link=Head of Security]]<br>[[Head of Security]]
|Make sure your team isn't [[Shitcurity]]. Wear a stylish yet protective coat. Focus your department's efforts on bigger fish than [[Clown|leeches]]. Chase down lone traitors and die alone in maintenance because YOU <b>ARE THE LAW</b> . Revel in the fact that everyone hates you. Carry half the Armory in your backpack. Have blood feuds with the Warden.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_warden.png|64px|link=Warden]]<br>[[Warden]]
|Sit in your office. Sit in your office, again. <s>Never</s> Watch security cameras. Steal from the armory, then order crates to cover it up. Maybe keep an eye or two on the armory (So that no one steals the stuff you want to steal), and SET A GODDAMN TIME TO THE TIMER for any arrested scum. Have blood feuds with the Head of Security.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Generic_security.png|64px|link=Security Officer]]<br>[[Security Officer]]
|Deal with the various [[clown|dirty]] [[assistant|fucking]] [[traitor|criminals]] running amok on the station. Taser people in the eyes. Pretend the Lawyer doesn't exist. Dogpile on traitors. Constantly get bitched at. Harmbaton people to death, claim they were "resisting arrest". Flashbang crowds until they are deaf and blind forever.  Arrest someone for a legitimate cause, get called shitcurity.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_detective.png|64px|link=Detective]]<br>[[Detective]]
|Chain smoke cigarettes. Shoot the useless assistants with your cowboy gun. Lose your cowboy gun in a Space Vegas gambling session. Litter the halls with photos. Solve crimes on rare occasion. 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|}

== Engineering ==
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#FFFFDD;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:orange;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:orange;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:orange;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_ce.png|64px|link=Chief Engineer]]<br>[[Chief Engineer]]
|Fly around in space while your [[Station Engineer|subordinates]] burn down engineering, cut life-support to the station, and release the <s><b>KRAKEN</b></s> singularity. 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_engineer.png|64px|link=Station Engineer]]<br>[[Station Engineer]]
|<s>Set up the singularity</s> Get shot by the emitters, get brutally murdered on the solars by a nuclear agent, get drunk in the bar. Make telecoms unusable with scripts. Sprint past hull breaches without a second thought. Hack every machine to shoot things at people.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Generic_atmos.png|64px|link=Atmospheric Technician]]<br>[[Atmospheric Technician]]
|Station's ghetto fireman. Ensure everyone can breathe by listening to complaints about how useless you are. If they can talk, everything's within tolerances. Build pipe slides. Forget all about repairing damaged piping. Make some bombs using the empty tanks and accidentally activate them in the hallway. Run around the station looking like a serial killer with a fire suit and axe. Release plasma into the halls.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium 
|}

== Science ==
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_rd.png|64px|link=Research Director]]<br>[[Research Director]]
|Oversee the [[Scientist|demented]] [[Roboticist|manchildren]] of your department. <s>Build</s> Destroy cyborgs with your magic button. Use Lamarr as a breath mask. Take control of the AI and rule the station.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:scientist_generic.png|64px|link=Scientist]]<br>[[Scientist]]
|Get tossed in disposal by the [[Research Director]], nag chemistry, "accidentally" blow up toxins, let the Slimes loose. Nag mining for diamonds so you can make two Bags of Holding to make a mini Singularity. Refuse to stop at the last three items in the previous list and accidentally kill yourself in enough stupid ways to make murder look like assisted suicide.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Roboticist.png|64px|link=Roboticist]]<br>[[Roboticist]]
|Build some nifty robots and BIG STOMPY MECHS! Dismantle the station for more metal. Have your cyborgs that you built turn on you when the AI goes rogue. Kill a patient and blame it on your colleagues for not knowing how to perform surgery. Be awesome and cut your own arm off to replace it with a Robo Arm, Just like Skywalker!
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|}

== Medical ==
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:lightblue;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_cmo.png|64px|link=Chief Medical Officer]]<br>[[Chief Medical Officer]]
|Complain no one listens to you. Help the virologist spread an epidemic. Fill your hypospray with Chloral Hydrate. Fetch Runtime mice from maintenance. Do everything (Everyone else under you does fuck all).
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|-
![[File:MedicalDoctor.png|64px|link=Medical Doctor]]<br>[[Medical Doctor]]
|<s>Heal people.</s> <s>Use your Sleeper or Cryo to heal people.</s> <s>Help the Virologist research cures to diseases and create new immune systems.</s> Nag Chemistry for chloral hydrate. Inject people with chloral hydrate and drag them to <s>the dungeon</s> surgery and give them a <s>sex change</s> appendix removal. Replace all the chems in Cryo with polytrinic acid. Inject people with mind breaker toxin. Get arrested when you do 'free' brain removals.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Chemist.png|64px|link=Chemist]]<br>[[Chemist]]
|Make chemicals and basically control the station. Fling grenades on the emergency shuttle. Misname bottles and get lynched by the Chief Medical Officer after they examine your bottle of "Omnizine". Inject the clown with enough mutagen to give a heart attack to a water buffalo. Dish out space drugs like no tomorrow. Make literal carpet bombs to make the corridors slightly more classy.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Geneticist.png|64px|link=Geneticist]]<br>[[Geneticist]]
|Give your monkeys Tourettes and broadcast their cursing across the station. <s>Clone</s> Ignore the tide of dead bodies that comes to your door. Lose your hair. Accidentally inject yourself with a monkey SE and get impaled by the cook. Get bombed every round.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Generic_virologist.png|64px|link=Virologist]]<br>[[Virologist]]
|Expect people you've never met to already hate you, try to eradicate the great space flu, create the next Pandemic, get killed for the clown releasing Pierrot's Throat. Ignore petty details like sanitation and outbreak prevention. Incarcerate someone forever [[Virology|in your dungeon]].
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|}

== Civilian ==
=== Supply ===
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#FFFFDD;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:orange;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:orange;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:orange;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_qm.png|64px|link=Quartermaster]]<br>[[Quartermaster]]
|Order crates and make sure your [[Cargo Technician|slaves]] do their jobs. Be an extremely vulnerable target for the [[Revolution]]. Order guns and secede from the station. Order virus crates and release the contents. <s>Force Lisa into sexual servitude with Ian.</s> Pet Lisa. Trade an assistant a toolbelt, multitool, rubber gloves, and a welding hat if they steal Runtime.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Generic_cargo.png|64px|link=Cargo Technician]]<br>[[Cargo Technician]]
|Push dem crates. Promote shorts as they are comfy and easy to wear. Steal <s>emitters</s> cargo in general. Give the MULEs a thirst for human blood. Whine because Security arrested you for ordering guns.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Generic_shaft.png|64px|link=Shaft Miner]]<br>[[Shaft Miner]]
|Mine rocks, try to mine monsters. Get science and robotics materials to get cool things. Go on a quest for the clown planet. Shoot people with your kinetic accelerator as if they were <s>rocks</s> monsters. Collapse in despair when the shuttle is called early. Collapse in general when goliaths robust you. Search for cool loot instead of actually mining for ore. Fall into a chasm and die.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
|}

=== Service ===
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_janitor.png|64px|link=Janitor]]<br>[[Janitor]]
|Mop blood off the floor, then get arrested for creating a safety hazard. Get killed for your boots. Swear constantly. Clean up gang tags, then get harmbatoned by Security because you were spotted near them.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Generic_barman.png|64px|link=Bartender]]<br>[[Bartender]]
|Mix cocktails, <s>protect Pun Pun at all cost</s> toss the monkey into disposals, dodge glasses being thrown at you, have your shotgun stolen and used against you. Let cargo borrow your shotgun in exchange for sawing it off for you. Act surprised when people start to die from drinking your "cocktails".
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Generic_chef.png|64px|link=Chef]]<br>[[Cook]]
|"Yur puurt thuur chiir-ken airn der bewl" - Cook delicious meals from spare meat in the morgue (Yum!), abduct Pun Pun at all costs and try to find out if it will blend. [[Critters#Neutral|Be brutally murdered by your pet goat]].
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Generic_botanist.png|64px|link=botanist]]<br>[[Botanist]]
|Grow <strike>the good stuff</strike> grass, place it everywhere, man. Oversee the production of illegal drugs security gives fuckall about. Smoke <s>weed</s> dandy corn-cob pipes er'ryday. Allow hydroponics to become a horrifying farmhouse.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|}

=== Miscellaneous ===
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#D8BFD8;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:#9ACD32;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#9ACD32;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:#9ACD32;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Generic_assistant2.png|64px|link=Assistant]]<br>[[Assistant]]
|AKA Space Bums. Be the kid in a candy shop. Steal things to see what funny message pops up when you commit suicide with them. Beat people/objects with toolboxes. Never, EVER remove your grey jumpsuit. Gangbang the captain to death with fellow grey tide drones and blame it on the clown.
!<span style="display: none;">f</span>None
|-
![[File:Generic_clown.png|64px|link=Clown]]<br>[[Clown]]
|Honk!  Play harmless pranks and hope you don't get your chest caved in!  Honk! Nag the HoP for an all-access pass. Honk! Nag robotics for a H.O.N.K. Mech. Honk! Use both tools to break into the Captain's office and HONK in his face. HONK!
!<span style="display: none;">e</span>HONK!
|-
![[File:Generic_mime.png|64px|link=Mime]]<br>[[Mime]]
|''*wave''
!<span style="display: none;">e</span>...
|-
![[File:Generic_chaplain.png|64px|link=Chaplain]]<br>[[Chaplain]]
|Drink your holy water. Preach your religion with your all-healing bible. Drink more holy water. Attempt to hold weddings and funerals. Make people retarded with your all-healing bible. Pretend to listen. Pray to the almighty <strike>God</strike> admins. Become unable to speak a coherent sentence after emptying your holy water.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Generic_librarian.png|64px|link=Librarian]]<br>[[Librarian]]
|Attempt to hold poetry readings. Host D&D games. Stalk people with your camera. Get lynched for reading pornography over the radio. Beat the snot out of anyone who doesn't return their library books. Allow the cult to set up an AI module in your private study.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Generic_lawyer.png‎|64px|link=Lawyer]]<br>[[Lawyer]]
|Tell security to notify you when a new prisoner arrives. Don't get notified. Be ignored and go to the bar. Become a drunken wreck and space yourself in frustration.  Occasionally find loopholes in infernal contracts and save souls from damnation.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|}

== Non-human ==

{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#DCDCDC;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:#A9A9A9;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#A9A9A9;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:#A9A9A9;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:AI.gif|64px|link=AI]]<br>[[AI]]
| Complain that you can't play this for a month. Follow your laws. Be the crew's bitch. Open doors. Malfunction. Get wiped for not letting the [[captain]] robust the [[clown]]. Get bitched at. Name yourself something sexual. Get bitched at. Get carded. Get bitched at.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_borg.png|64px|link=Cyborg]]<br>[[Cyborg]]
|Follow your laws and hope that you aren't blown up due to [[Research Director|certain individuals]]. Forget to recharge. Forget completely that you're still somewhat human and do mindless repetitive tasks without emotion.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Generic drone.png|64px|link=Drone]]<br>[[Drone]]
|Become that adorable robotic pet. Fix the holes the crew will inevitably make. Steal everything not bolted down. Get picked up and used as a hat against your will. Be more competent than the stations Engineers. Get killed by the Engineers for being more competent than them.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Pai.png|64px|link=Personal AI]]<br>[[Personal AI]]
|Be the friend someone has always wanted (if they bother downloading you). Whine in OOC because they didn't. Don't fill any of the fields except the name field.
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Shade.png|64px|link=Construct]]<br>[[Construct]]
|Get wrecked by cult, or change map preference to meta and tip your fedora at the chaplain. laugh at the assistant trying to punch you, then get killed by a simplemob carp. Start beefs with other constructs for getting the first shell, ask for juggernaut and get <s>spaced</s> wraith.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Easy to Medium
|-
![[File:Ghost2.png|64px|link=Ghost]]<br>[[Ghost]]
|Talk to the other [[Clown|dead]] [[Assistant|people]]. Complain about the living. Admin help. <s>Omnighost</s> Orbit around the singulo pretending to be a black hole. <s>Watch ERP</s>. Beg the admin to deploy a space ninja. All follow an antag like some form of ethereal dog pile.
!<span style="display: none;">f</span>Ghastly!
|}

== Antagonist ==

{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:silver;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:brown;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="color:white;background-color:brown;" |Role
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:brown;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:Traitor.png|64px|link=Traitor]]<br>[[Traitor]]
|Buy an ebow and esword and make people cry. Ignore your objectives and go on a rampage with your cool gear. Get unceremoniously killed and spaced by a toolbox-wielding assistant.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Cultist.png|64px|link=Cult magic]]<br>[[Cultist]]
|Scribble runes. Summon eldritch gods. Rock out with your <s>cock</s> cult blade out and get arrested.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Changeling.gif|64px|link=Changeling]]<br>[[Changeling]]
|Think John Carpenter's 'The Thing', without 'The Thing' part. Relieve humans of their DNA and brain cells, which they don't use much anyway.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Shadowbeing.png|64px|link=Shadowling]]<br>[[Shadowling]]
|Be the hip and more popular brother to the Changeling. Turn the station into thralls. Cry when a cyborg turns on its headlamp. Shadow Walk into space and die ten minutes into the round.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Agent.png|64px|link=Abductor]]<br>[[Abductor]]
|Kidnap people and experiment on them. Disregard that objective and <s>kidnap Ian</s> kill the AI. Accidently kidnap yourself. Steal the armory after loosing your tools. Hope your fellow Scientist/Agent is not incompetent and lets the crew kidnap you.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_nukesyndie.png|64px|link=Syndicate guide]]<br>[[Syndicate guide|Nuclear Operative]]
|Someone set us up the bomb! (AKA You) Get dat fukken disk. Plant a power sink on the solars. Waste all your telecrystals on balloons. Arm the nuke while your fellows are still on the station. Kidnap Ian.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:Assistant.png|64px|link=Revolution]]<br>[[Revolution|Revolutionary]]
|Greytide without worrying about getting banned. Either kill the CMO and RD in under five minutes, or get crushed under Security's boots.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Easy to Hard
|-
![[File:Mobster.png|64px|link=Gang]]<br>[[Gang|Gangster]]
|Vandalize the station and get into fights with rivals. Litter the halls with bullet casings. Get ignored by your own gang. Just don't forget: Snitches Get Stitches.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]]<br>[[Wizard]]
|FORTI GY AMA!! EI NATH!!
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]][[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]][[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]]<br>[[Wizard|Ragin Mages]]
|Spend ten minutes hunting down one Wizard, kill him thinking you've won! Stare in horror as three more Wizards appear. Watch in amusement as they proceed to kill each other.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:Alien.png|64px|link=Alien]]<br>[[Xenos|Xenomorph]]
|Ensure the crew gets a face full of alien ''wing-wang''. Break procs. Squander your chance to be a big, purple killing machine and your race's survival in favor of acting out the librarian's favorite porno.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Blob core.gif|64px|link=Blob]]<br>[[Blob]]
|Forget you're infected with the blob, burst in the HoP line while begging for all access. Somehow manage to not die within five minutes of bursting. Get killed by the augmented, riot suit wielding Head of Security. 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Morph.png|64px|link=Morph]]<br>[[Morph]]
|Eat pens for amusement, disguise yourself as beepsky. Disguise yourself as the Captain, confront the Captain while disguised as him, get shot.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Monkey.png|64px|link=Game Mode#Monkey]]<br>[[Game Mode#Monkey|Monkey]]
|Attempt to infect the crew with the monkey virus. Get absolutely crushed by Security within five minutes. Spend the next two hours as a ghost.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:Generic_ninja.png|64px|link=Space Ninja]]<br>[[Space Ninja]]
|Follow your orders, which may or may not involve you killing everything that moves, proceed to kill everyone anyway.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|-
![[File:Revenant.png|64px|link=Revenant]]<br>[[Revenant]]
|Shock lights, transmit WGW right into the librarian until he goes mad. Trade for them until <s>admins</s> gods get fed up with you and turn ghosts into you. Cry when the chaplain hits you with his obsidian rod, realize he always picks a snowflake weapon anyway. Be a griefghost.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
|-
![[File:Stand.gif|64px|link=Guardian Spirit]]<br>[[Guardian Spirit]]
|Do what your summoner tells you to do. Set your battlecry to something so awful it makes your foes cry in battle. Be a punchghost.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>ORA ORA ORA
|-
![[File:Swarmer.png|64px|link=Swarmers]]<br>[[Swarmers]]
|Consume. Replicate. Repeat. Eat Telecomms. Teleport <s>other swarmers</s> your enemies away from your metal. 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
|-
![[File:devil.gif|64px|link=devil]]<br>[[Devil]]
|Engage in civil discussions to buy souls.  Create emergencies so that people are desperate enough to sell their soul.  Try to out wit the lawyer.  Get punched to death by someone you just turned into a hulk.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
|}

== Special ==

{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#DCDCDC;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:lightblue" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=100|Difficulty
|-
![[File:centcomofficial.png|64px|link=Centcom Official]]<br>[[Centcom Official]]
|Be self-important, meddle with station affairs, annoy the Captain with bureaucracy. Get killed almost immediately by a random mob. Have you body looted by everyone, including the captain.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
|-
![[File:Ian.PNG|64px|link=Ian]]<br>[[Ian]]
|Ass-inspect, eat donuts, get killed, be dragged off to a washing machine and get gibbed. Cause a riot.
!<span style="display:none;">a</span>Impossible
|-
![[File:Chrono.png|64px|Chrono Legionnaire]]<br>Chrono Legionnaire
|Erase the Clown from time. Accidently erase your objective from time. Never be spawned by a admin for being too powerful. Without a trace! 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Never Existed
|-
![[File:emergencyresponseteamcommander.png|link=Emergency Response Team]]<br>[[Emergency Response Team|Emergency Response Officer]]
|Arrive too late on the station to actually help. Lose the rest of your team, get outnumbered and die. Respawn as a second response team to save the first team.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Very Hard
|-
![[File:deathsquadofficer.png|64px|link=Death squad]]<br>[[Death squad|Death Squad Officer]]
|Beg for DS, spawn in at centcom, kill an admin who was trying to tell you your mission, get gibbed, beg for another chance. Set your rifle to DESTROY and terminate all lifeforms (including walls). Slip on a banana peel and a̶n̶d̶ ̶g̶e̶t̶ ̶b̶l̶a̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶b̶l̶i̶v̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶o̶w̶n̶ ̶r̶i̶f̶l̶e̶ laugh as your boots prevent you from slipping and the Clown can't fire your DNA-locked rifle. Shoot the Clown with your Mataba Revolver.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
|}

== Species ==
Read More: [[Guide to races]]
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:darkgreen;" width=200|Specie
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:darkgreen;" |Description
! scope="col" style="background-color:darkgreen;" width=100|Prevalence
|-
![[File:Human.png|64px|link=Humans]]<br>[[Humans|Humans]]
|Behave like the dominant species you are. Beat skulls in with a toolbox and remind everyone that you are essentially a bald ape. Get leg-dropped by a wrestler and watch as your leg actually falls off. Pray to be changed into a catgirl/boy, get changed into an actual cat instead.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Common
|-
![[File:Lizardman.png|64px|link=Lizardperson]]<br>[[Lizardmen]]
|Name yourself Does-The-Gimmick. Set all your accessory slots and become an unrecognisable blob of pixels. <strike>Be locked out of important positions.</strike> Threaten the HoP with a lawsuit if he doesn't promote you to a Head position. Make it hard to understand a word you say by hissing frequently. Get discriminated against for being a special snowflake.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Uncommon
|-
![[File:Flyperson.png|64px|link=Flyperson]]<br>[[Flyperson]]
|Annoy the chef for his cheese, vomit on his food and kill Pete because <strike>you need barf fuel</strike> muh self defense. Start getting voices in your head when you read the bee movie script over the radio. Get lynched for attacking the botanist using pest spray, and get gibbed by the chef for 'no reason'.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Uncommon
|-
![[File:Plasmaman.png|64px|link=Plasmamen]]<br>[[Plasmamen]]
|Light the entirety of the station on fire. Be triggered by cold environments. Claim that you're a space beast that's come to kill everything, ever.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Rare
|-
![[File:Slimepeople.png|64px|link=Slimepeople]]<br>[[Slimepeople#Slimepeople|Slimeperson]]
|Be the specialest snowflake in xenobiology. Hang out with your <s>only</s> slime friends. Swap between bodies. Inject people with your poisonous blood. 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Very Rare
|-
![[File:Podman.png|64px|link=Podman]]<br>[[Podmen]]
|End up as mister potatohead after Genetics gets blown up and the Botanist is not stoned enough to forget he can clone too, but too stoned to do a good job. Forget that you photosynthesise and grow obese in the light. Start vegetating with relative ease. Remember that you're basically a walking matchstick well after you marched into a plasma fire.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Very Rare
|}
[[Category:Jobs]]